20221229

2020s blogules

Below, a list of blogules spilled over the 2020s decade. A far cry from the heyday, but I post way more often on Twitter (@stephanemot, @theseoulvillage...).

NB : updated randomly, check the left column for the full list. For list of lists of blogules (2003 - to date), go to the bottom of this post or to the blogules transfusion center.
  
 
blogules Season XX (2022)
 
. "2020s blogules"   
. "Happy New Year 2024"
. "The Prisoner's Rover v. Josh Hawley"   
. "America's War on Prevention"
. "Exclusive fake interview with Vladimir Putin"  
 
blogules Season XIX (2021)
  
. "Happy New Year 2023"
. "Exclusive fake interview with Obstructionist in Chief Mitch McConnell"   
. "Deuce in Senate, Now Who's Ready To Serve For America?"

blogules Season XVIII (2020)
 
. "Happy New Year 2022"
. "Obstruction
. "Trump: 'my plan to steal the elections' (fake interview, real threats)"
. "A Democratic. National. Convention. With Mender In Chief Joe Biden.
. "Kanye West: a fake #BlackLivesMatter candidate to rescue a real White Supremacist"
. "Make America Breathe Again, Vote Biden
. "Just one more thing, Mr Trump
. "Happy New Year 2021 (a bit belated, but there was a shortage of blogules)"
. "Coronavirus - protect yourself 100% from the truth with this Trump Mask:"   
. "John BOLTON submits draft to Vlad"



Previous seasons: 



blogules 2023
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
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20221226

Happy New Year 2024

It's that time of the year*, and as usual, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2023:

January 2023

Xi Jinping declares the pandemic over as China achieves herd immunity with only 271,564,888 fatalities. Some suspect the actual tally could be twice as high.

February 2023

On the anniversary of the invasion of Ukraine, and following a referendum held at the Russian Embassy in D.C., the United States are officially annexed by Russia. 

March 2023

Hours after Vladimir Putin is assassinated by an aide, Amerika Oblast declares its independence from Russia. All Russian troops withdraw from Ukraine and Georgia.

April 2023

Key collaborators to the 2023 insurrection, Donald Trump, Tucker Carson, and Ted Cruz are arrested just before boarding a plane for Cancun: 'you can't touch me', says the 45th POTUS, 'I'm a Russian diplomat and Vladimir gave me this Russian passport to prove it'. In retaliation, the  Republican House votes to impeach Joe Biden for collusion with Ukraine.

May 2023

Great Britain celebrates the coronation of her new king. William III pays a vibrant tribute to his late father, crushed during the rehearsals of his own big day: "that crown was definitely too heavy for poor Charles III".

June 2023

In Turkey, all opposition candidates are jailed ahead of the general elections. Erdogan claims victory with 125% of the votes: 'I scored a bit lower that the latest polls predicted, but that proves how rock solid our democracy is.'

July 2023 

The US Supreme Court reinstates Scott v. Sandford, making slavery once again legal in the US. Ron DeSantis applauds the decision: 'I'll send even more illegal migrants to Washington - soon I'll need to get some work done on my White House'.

August 2023 

Elon Musk still hasn't found his successor to lead Twitter; he never really looked for one, and both Kanye West and the QAnon Shaman rejected the offer.

September 2023 

Following Pope Francis' trip to Africa, the head of the Church and 80% of his potential successors die of Ebola in the Vatican Cluster.

October 2023 

One year later, Rishi Sunak is still Prime Minister. And still the wealthiest man in the Kingdom, with twenty five billion pounds (around one thousand four hundred US dollars).

November 2023 

Joe Biden declares his candidacy to succeed Pope Francis and wins in a landslide. Pete Buttigieg thanks Kamala Harris for picking him: 'an Asian African American woman President and a gay Hoosier Veep... America is alive and ticking boxes!'

December 2023 

Mayor Lori Lightfoot laments in front of an almost dried up Lake Michigan: "60 degrees on Christmas Day. Over zero, and in Celsius... yet climate change did nothing for that damned wind."


blogules 2022
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com.

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* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020), "Happy New Year 2022" (Dec 2020), "Happy New Year 2023" (Dec 2021), "Happy New Year" (Dec 2022)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020), "Bonne année 2022" (Dec 2020), "Bonne année 2023" (Dec 2021), "Bonne année 2024" (Dec 2022).

20220724

The Prisoner's Rover v. Josh Hawley

Josh Hawley was actually caught twice by The Prisoner's Rover (giant ball) in D.C.:

1) as he cowardly ran away from the Capitol Riot, right after entering while fist pumping to the Trump Insurrection crowd



2) as he cowardly swam away from mocking crowds through the Lincoln Memorial Reflection Pool (of course still no reflection for this fool):



blogules 2022
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com. Bookmark and Share

20220526

America's War on Prevention

If America keeps failing with gun violence, that's fundamentally because she's waging war on prevention, and because the forces that feed upon these failures have faced impunity for too long.

Worse: constant mass shootings are only one of the nation's most obvious self inflicted traumas. At least, there, everybody knows the rules of the game: 

  • more people die of guns in the US than anywhere else, and not just because 332M Americans own 400M of them
  • implementing basic gun control laws (e.g. background checks) have always showed spectacular results, including in the States between the moment Bill Clinton signed the last batch and the moment Republicans blocked its prolongation
  • even if a vast majority of Americans (including within Republicans) support these laws, the NRA and the GOP keep distorting the 2nd Amendment to push even harder against any kind of oversight or accountability. 
  • the situation keeps worsening: Republicans are likely to sweep the Middterms, and the Supreme Court they reshaped against the will of the people is likely to dismantle the few remaining safeguards. This self-proclaimed 'pro-life' crew prefers to protect guns to protecting the lives of kids or pregnant teens.

America is not just sick, she doesn't want to heal.  

And that's exactly the same story with health in general. Even before the pandemic, America spent one third more per capita on healthcare than any other developed country, and yet saw her life expectancy plummet, the average health of her citizens being more worthy of a laggard.

Like with guns, there's a lot of money involved, but here, at least two families of lobbies are working in sinc to sink the boat: where everywhere else the focus is on prevention, Big Pharma and Big Food make sure that prevention is withdrawn from all policies, and that only the 'cures' they propose are considered. Because they couldn't gain more shares of stomachs, Big Food had the genius idea of supersizing our stomachs, and Big Pharma certainly can't complain because they make more money selling drugs that no one needs when they follow just a normal diet. And don't count on health associations to defend consumers: most of them are bankrolled by the same lobbies, and promote the very behaviors they're supposed to fight against.

The prevention of gun violence, obesity or heart diseases are national causes everywhere except in the US, where they would mean the end of the party for lobbies who need America to keep getting sicker instead of healing.

If these lobbies reach across the aisle, they've always worked in symbiosis with the Republican Party. But that party itself has given up all restraints, any ambition for common ground or common sense. And it's now waging war at all levels. 

Solutions to major problems are no-brainers? Let's dumb everybody further down, let's ban books, let's reject facts, truth, reason, and science. We want you to feel stupid, victimized, angry, we want you to replace critical thinking with systematic, blind criticism, we want you to forget about moderation and to live on a permanent conflictual mode.

The GOP not only stopped fighting racism, it's deliberately fueling it now, crushing voting rights for minorities, promoting voices that fuel hatred (exhibit A: Tucker Carson spreading the Great Replacement fallacy). The big tent has turned into a dangerous tin foil hat under which thrive the worst of the worst (Holocaust deniers and white supremacists are more welcome than ever).

Even if they know better, these guys will tell you with a straight face that the Earth is flat, that Trump won in 2020, and that arming teachers is the solution when even a squad of trained police officers are scared to face a teenager carrying assault weapons.

Pew Research on bipartisan support for gun control
NB: more data on Brady Campaign's website: bradyunited.org/resources



blogules 2022
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
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20220228

Exclusive fake interview with Vladimir Putin

Yesterday, I met in person Vladimir Putin at the Kremlin for an exclusive fake interview with my Agence Fausse Presse. We actually chatted over the phone, since we were each seated at one end of a 75-meter-long marble table.


blogules - 'Thank you for having me for breakfast, and not on the menu'.

Vladimir Putin - 'You're welcome. And don't worry, I don't eat people. Ukrainians do. They're genocidal, war-mongering neo-nazi cannibals, kabbalist pedophiles, and they always distort the truth.'

b - 'If I may, you're the blood-thisrty war-monger pushing massive disinformation campaigns and spreading totally outrageous lies about Ukraine. And as far as neo-nazis go, you're the one helping Assad gas his own people, you're the one playing the Hitler playbook with a fallacious story about 'liberating' Ukraine, just like Adolf invaded Poland under the fake pretext that its German minorities suffered from persecution.'

VP - 'Don't push your luck, I may reconsider my vegetarian habits for breakfast... I'm not Hitler. I'm just a Russian leader defending Russian interests. We're the ones who defeated Hitler, remember?'

b - 'Stalin did play a decisive role in defeating Nazi Germany. He was also a ruthless dictator and Imperialist who spread war across the globe and was responsible for millions of Russian deaths.'

VP - 'I'm not Stalin. I'm not a communist.'

b - 'But you never swallowed the fall of the Soviet Union. Like Hitler with 1919, you're obsessed with reversing 1991.'

VP - 'Russia goes beyond regimes. The Tsars passed, the USSR passed, Russia remains.'

b - 'Putism will pass. Heck, it doesn't even exist. Do you consider yourself like one of the Great Tsars, the way Erdogan pretends to be a Great Sultan or Xi Jinping acts like the new Emperor?'

VP - 'I'm not Ivan The Terrible. My business model is more the mob.'

b - 'Exactly. You don't have a system to sustain or to survive you, you're using smokescreens of ideologies, nationalism, religion, or such obsolete symbols as the Cossacks to cement your power and your image, but basically you're just a mob boss.'

VP - 'I'm simply the G.O.A.T. I don't even have lieutenants or deputies. For the power, I have my KGB-FSB circle at home, and thugs like Ramzan Kadyrov or Alexander Lukashenko nearby. For the money, I have oligarchs: I keep them alive, away from jail, and rich, they give me a fat cut on their wealth. Now I'm much richer than Musk, Bezos, and Zuckerberg combined. And these losers only have paper when I have gold, properties, real assets. I don't have shareholders to answer to, and my rockets can have a significantly greater impact than their baby boy toys'

b - 'Your nukes definitely can. When you put the World on high nuclear alert, when you threaten even Sweden and Finland, are you deliberately playing the 'mad man', or have you gone full paranoid, on a Nero-tic path? Even if, one day, you win in Ukraine, aren't you already losing it? I mean where's the charming, fit, acute strategic thinker these days? We can only see a vulgar, puffed up egotist with serious anger management issues. Is it steroids? Are you sick, physically and/or mentally?'

VP - 'You, for sure, are utterly crazy. You must know that disrespectful journalists don't live old here.'

b - 'I never pretended to be a journalist.'

VP - 'Well you know how I treat comedians. Ask Volodymyr Zelensky.'

b - 'I never pretended to be a comedian. And Zelensky is not an actor anymore. Unlike you, he's a genuine patriot.'

VP - 'I'm a patriot. You may not know it yet, but Russia has been renamed Putinia. And Saint Petersburg Putingrad. And no, I'm not stopping at Georgia, Ukraine or Sweden. I must reclaim control of the States and put my thug back on the throne.'

b - 'All you're managing to do is to make the EU and NATO relevant and strong again. Trump failed to destroy NATO for you, and Biden will not let that happen.'

VP - 'Joe Biden is already out. My Republican Party is doing a great job at destroying American democracy from the inside, and my local disinformation machine has never been damaged. As for Europe, I still control it.'

b - 'Are you kidding?'

VP - 'Never with business. Germany? Dope pushers hooked to my fossil fuel. And that Olaf Scholz is such a joke... Like Macron, he just came for his national credentials. Macron is not dumb, he doesn't get confrontational. He knows I didn't want him to win in 2017, he knows how easily I got rid of Juppe and Barnier in the primaries (yeah, this year, I had to make dead people and even a dog vote, but still no sweat), he knows I how I can destroy him by putting gullible masses on the street. Yellow Jackets, antivaxxers.... piece of cake. But Macron also knows how to flatter egos. Look how he impressed Trump with the Invalides and that military show. Look how he had me tour Versailles and our new Russian Spiritual and Cultural Center in Paris - by the way the mayor was so easy to corrupt on that one. Did you see how the golden dome of my church outshines the Eiffel Tower along the Seine river? How could you frogs let that happen?'

b - 'I see. Let's not even talk about the UK...'

VP - 'I sent them back to the Jurassic with Brexit, and Boris Johnson is clearly more a Fred Flintstone than a T-rex. We own London, corrupted it to the core, and they won't have the guts to pull the plug. I'm not worried about sanctions anyway. We've got them all already sorted out with Jinping, Narendra, and Ali (that's Khamenei).'

b - 'If you always have your usual partners overseas, you're losing support at home. Old Russians in rural areas may buy your propaganda, but the urban youth knows that you won't be here forever, and more and more people start questioning your mental state...'

VP - 'Bah. I'll probably have to create yet another hostage crisis. You know, like at the Moscow Theater or at that Breslan school. Nothing like it to boost the ratings. Otherwise, I can still lose a few more millions Russians; our demographics are not so good anyways. Yes, they can't be all put to rest with a gallon of vodka, like I did with Boris Yeltsin, but I already got rid of hundreds of thousands during the pandemic. Only 'good citizens' got good vaccines. Why do you think we push antivaxxers, beyond undermining Western democracies? Xi and I need to compensate our lousy vaxxes, so if they're 60-70% efficient only, turning 30-40% of your populations into antivaxxers brings you and your economies down to our level.'

b - 'And as for more surgical strikes, who's the next Alexei Navalny on your hit list beyond Zelensky, Vitali Klitschko, and friends?' 

VP - 'Adam Kinzinger. Couldn't find any kompromat on him. I had kilometers of reels for Lindsey Graham, and Mitch McConnell only required wads of cash, but this guy is a disgrace for my new and improved GOP.'

b - 'So what do you have about Trump?'

VP - 'A lot of kompromat, but I don't even need that to manipulate this pathetic loser. Not even all the money we gave him to keep him afloat, or his ties to the Mafia. You know, this crybaby truly dreams of becoming a mob boss too. How cute.'

b - 'I also have questions about human rights and the environment.'

VP - 'I don't have time to answer. Anyway you know where I stand: I don't care about human rights, and I'm a strong believer in climate change.'

b - '?!?'

VP - 'I'm investing in facilities to harvest the methane liberated by the melting permafrost, and accelerating climate change to anschluss all arctic routes. Since all the icecap has already melted, we had to plant our flags on the ocean floor.

b - 'But then, where will you organize the Winter Olympics in 2036?'

VP - 'In Alaska. Ivanka has already agreed to sell it to us during her fourth mandate. Now you must go.'

b - 'Okay. I guess thank you for being as honest as an expert propagandist dictator can be.'

VP - 'You're welcome. And obviously you liked the breakfast. Did you know my granddad cooked for Lenin and Stalin? I saw you ate all the cookies, but could you taste the Novichok?'


blogules 2022
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com. Bookmark and Share

20211215

Happy New Year 2023

It's that time of the year*, and as usual, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2022:

January 2022
On January 6, the Capitol is stormed again: hundreds of Trump loyalists demand all insurrectionist GOP lawmakers to follow them in jail. Comments from the pack leader, 'QAnon Shaman' Jake Angeli: "I know that for this party the little guys are always supposed to pay for the big guys, but today, we the base say that the time has come for some trickle-up politics".


February 2022
Queen Elizabeth II's Platinum Jubilee draws more viewers than the opening ceremony of the Winter Olympics. In parallel to Beijing 2022, a parody Squid Game Season 2022 runs on all major networks to expose the regime's human rights abuses with an all time record of audience for the gold medal final in Blood-curling. "This is an insult to our philanthropic institution", cries Thomas Bach. "We at the Communist Party of China always preferred red to pink".


March 2022
The WHO secretly hopes that with the next variant, Psi, the pandemic will shrink.


April 2022
This time, Vladimir Putin wins the French presidential elections. Not with one of his expected candidates (Le Pen, Zemmour, Melenchon etc), but with some obscure conspiracy theorist youtuber pushing his Yellow Vest / Antivax / Flat Earth platform.


May 2022
Olaf Scholz wins the Eurovision contest: "at last I made the international headlines. Now I've got to convince people that I replaced Angela Merkel".


June 2022
India becomes the most populated nation on Earth. To protest, Xi Jinping blocks all water coming from the Himalaya: "Let's call it a drought".


July 2022
If NASA officially recognizes Donald Trump as an astronaut, the former president keeps fuming: "my quickie in Jeff Bezos' elevator went BAD. I invited a few playmates to have some fun in total weightlessness, but that golden shower was a TOTAL MESS!"


August 2022
Climate change refugees flock from Florida. Says one: "just when we refurbished our 16-bedroom villa by the sea, we lost the Keys..."


September 2022
To celebrate the bicentennial of Brazil's independence, the people ejects Jair Bolsonaro from power. "We would have beheaded him, if only he had a head to begin with".

 

October 2022
In one day, all financial markets plummet by 50%, all cryptocurrencies by 95%. No billionaire is seriously hurt.

 

November 2022
GQP wins the Midterm Elections by a landslide with 40% of the vote. Qatar wins its soccer World Cup without losing a game, its striker Jerry Mander finishing best scorer.

 

December 2022
The Nobel Peace Prize goes to 3 recipients:
- Vladimir Putin for ending the Russia-Ukraine conflict by anschlussing Ukraine
- the Talibans for ending the gender war by suppressing all non male genders
- Boris Johnson for ending the year with the mother of all covid parties

Seriously, I do wish everyone of us a very, very, very happy new year 2022.

 
blogules 2021
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com. Bookmark and Share

* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020), "Happy New Year 2022" (Dec 2020), "Happy New Year 2023" (Dec 2021)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020), "Bonne année 2022" (Dec 2020), "Bonne année 2023" (Dec 2021).

20210710

Exclusive fake interview with Obstructionist in Chief Mitch McConnell

It took only a dozen money transfers to his offshore accounts for Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell to accept an exclusive fake interview with our Agence Fausse Presse.

blogules: "Senator, thank you for having us."

Mitch McConnell: "You're welcome, interesting to see that Fox News or Sinclair Broadcasting are not the only pseudo medias out there."

b: "How do you want History to remember you? As Donald Trump's  Paul von Hindenburg? As the man who stole the Supreme Court? As D.C.'s most morally corrupt and hypocrite politician?"

MMC: "Nice try, but flattery doesn't work on me: Elaine and I prefer bribery in cash. That said, I guess the last compliment fits best my ultimate ambition."

b: "You have a serious competitor in Donald Trump."

MMC: "He definitely would be if he were a politician. But the former and present President is a salesman. And he sells only one product: himself."

b: "The former and present President?"

MMC: "You know my motto in politics: I want it all, and I want it both ways. We all know that Joe Biden won by a landslide, but that's not what Donald Trump and his base want to hear."

b: "But his Big Lie fueled the bloody January 6th attack of the Capitol."

MMC: "Clearly, Trump is responsible for the insurrection, his inaction during the attack amounts to dereliction of duty, he is the most appalling President in our history, and a constant threat for our democracy, but we need the Big Lie fallacy to justify our voter suppression laws, to steal the 2022 elections, and to put him back in the White House."

b: "So you confirm what everybody who follows the actual news knows, which is: the Republican establishment deliberately follows Trump's dangerous lies just to help the party artificially cling to power, even if that means destroying American democracy."

MMC: "Of course that's the plan. We simply can't win if everybody is allowed to vote, and by 'everybody', yes we do mean black voters. If we managed to score key wins in the past simply by gerrymandering or redistricting, now we have no choice but to go Jim Crow full throttle."

b: "Well, you do have a choice: clean up your party, repudiate conspiracy theories, kick out Qanon, the KKK, and the Nazis, and win around restored Lincoln values..."

MMC: "But we can't go against these guys anymore, just like we can't go against Trump. At the beginning we entertained his conspiracy theories just to spare his ego and to keep him happy, but once we've understoods that Republican voters believe his Big Lie and everything he says, and that we can use this to steal the next elections, we just let the racists run our show - by the way did you see the splendid Nazi runes at the CPAC conference?"

"#CPAC stage shaped like an #OdalRune... That's the symbol US #Neonazis have picked to replace #Nazi #swastika and go mainstream in US politics. The whole #GOP is #RINO: #Republican party officially replaced by #Trump #cult &  #fascism. Sce @dailykos" (20210227 - twitter.com/stephanemot/status/1365560322858254341)
 

b: "That's abominable."

MMC: "I know, but it works. Look at the Supreme Court! If Stephen Breyer is kind enough to pass away after our triumph at the Mid-term elections, we'll go 7-2."

b: "Now Merrick Garland is back to haunt you and to clean up William Barr's mess... You have absolutely no moral compass, no ethics."

MMC: "Thank you. We have a reputation to maintain as a couple: Elaine Chao and Mitch McConnell have the highest standards when it comes to moral corruption."

b: "Don't you have anything positive to motivate you in any way?"

MMC: "Ummm... no. I'm 100% focused on blocking Joe Biden like I was to block Barack Obama."

b: "And you were ready to impeach Bill Clinton for something that was a thousand times less impeachable than what Trump did."

MMC: "The Trumpites think that the Clintons are dangerous, they even believe that Hillary eats babies! I'm proud of the fact that we got Bill and her testify for hours (all for nothing of course), while Kevin McCarthy, Devin Nunes, Ted Cruz, Lauren Boebert, Josh Hawley and Co. can do and say whatever they fancy and get away without any hearing. Guess what: impeachment is not about justice. Everything is political. And with politics, I don't compromise. For instance, if Joe Biden wants to meet us halfway, it's not appropriate for us to help him achieve anything. Anyway we can't achieve anything with those Democrats. They're never ready to compromise."

b: "You've got some gall! John McCain would be so ashamed of you."

MMC: "If he were alive, he'd probably kick my fat bottom, and punch Lindsey Graham in the face. John knew me, so he couldn't have been disappointed. But Lindsey... going at Hunter Biden, selling his soul to Putin, to Russia... if I'm the undisputed king of all hypocrites, Linnie's the mother of all fallen angels."

b: "Is they...? Now the closest thing to a John McCain the GOP has in Congress could well be Adam Kinzinger, but he's not even a Senator..."

MMC: "Adam does have a big moral compass, indeed. Therefore, we'll have to get rid of him, just like we will with Liz Cheney and Mitt Romney."

b: "Wait. They're all Republicans. They are not your enemies."

MMC: "Of course they're not our enemies. But we don't care about the Democrats anymore - we've already fixed the next elections, remember? These rogue lawmakers are much more problematic because they make us look bad. They are conservative Republicans, and they always vote as conservative Republicans should, but that's not what we want now because it means that they can't vote for Trump or Qanon stuff, and we can't afford dissent on the very essence of our new platform. We can afford people like Elise Stefanik, people who, even if they have voted in favor of liberal issues before, are ready to sell their soul and kiss Trump's ring or whatever."

b: "And you're totally ok with your party being represented by a lunatic extremist like Marjorie Taylor Greene or a pedophile clown like Matt Gaetz."

MMC: "The Donald loves them, so we love them. Personally, I feel more comfortable with people who reflect our core values. For example, Ron DeSantis has corruption written all over this face, and you won't find a better nazi pit bull than Jim Jordan. The Donald loves them and I love them too."

b: "So why don't you invite KIM Jong-un to chair the GOP? The Donald loves him too, no? Wait... I know: you already proposed him, but he refused for some reason. Maybe because of the anti-Asian sentiment fueled by your boss and his friends."

MMC: "You're right. And you're wrong. He accepted. As Elaine often says, there's nothing Chinese money can't solve."


blogules 2021
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com. Bookmark and Share


20210122

Deuce in Senate, Now Who's Ready To Serve For America?

So the Trump Insurrection failed, the disgraced POTUS and his white supremacist followers face trial, Anthony Fauci can at long last speak openly with the blessing of sound leaders (welcome to Joe Biden and Kamala Harris), and poetry has never been that supercool (O Say Can You See Amanda Gorman?).

But. 

Coronavirus destruction has yet to peak, Qanon propagandists have yet to mutate and splinter into new murderous sleeping cells, Obstructionist in Chief Mitch McConnell remains the most noxious politician in town, and the GOP has yet to declare its independence from its worst enemies from within (don't count on Kevin McCarthy, whose new blend of mccarhyism will forever associate the House GOP's legacy to that of the ultimate traitor). 


Can new budget chair Bernie Sanders balance Trump Era's kolossal deficits?

This time, GOP lawmakers won't go away with the outrageous elusive tactics they used for the 2020 impeachment. They'll have to decide how History will remember them by answering simple questions: is it okay for a President to incite an insurrection? can Donald Trump be allowed to run again for office?

I count on justice to at last catch up with Trump, his corrupt family, his enablers (Ted Cruz must go, but bigger fishes must as well), and all blends of hatemongers who preyed upon the desperate and the gullible.


blogules 2021
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com. Bookmark and Share

20201216

Happy New Year 2022

It's that time of the year*, and I won't skip my duties after what happened last year (ICYMI** for the first time in a decade, I skipped my worst wishes exorcism... which obviously caused that awful 2020). 

So as usual, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2021:

January 2021
On January 20th, at the very moment Joe Biden is inaugurated, Donald Trump announces his candidacy for 2024, followed one hour later by Ivanka and Don Jr. Before sunset, Eric withdraws from the Grand Old Parody primaries, Barron launches a PAC for 2032, and Melania files for divorce.

February 2021
Ireland welcomes the first refugees from Britain following the Great Brexit Famine.

March 2021
To defend them during their trial, the murderers of George Floyd hire the KKK's Grand Wizard. All get additional jail time for not wearing a mask, the Grand Wizard for refusing to remove his hood. Once exposed, Stephen Miller leaves his job to Rudy Giuliani for the lawyer part, the KKK side going to The Donald.

April 2021
Raul Castro leaves power. The Trump family offers to rule for the next 62 years.

May 2021
Eurovision contest returns. In protest, Europe returns to lockdown.

June 2021
Donald Trump wins the presidential elections in Iran. Ali Khamenei demands a recount.

July 2021
After a second cancellation of the Tokyo 2020 Olympics, the first Medical Olympics are held in Japan. Moderna must return its gold medal following a failed doping test (
anabolic hydroxychloroquine).

August 2021
As he celebrates his landslide win at the Ethiopian elections, Xi Jinping announces the postponement of Hong Kong's vote from September 2021 to October 2047.

September 2021
At long last, Angela Merkel is free to go wild, do and say whatever she fancies. The now former Chancellor immediately returns to the university to further study science and Russian. Donald Trump's comment on Twitter: 'What a loser. instead, I would play golf all day. Hell, I even prefer watching TV all day here in Rykers Island.'

October 2021
A popular uprising removes Jair Bolsonaro from power after he pledged to destroy the last remaining section of the Amazonian rainforest (a six square foot patch near a mass burial site).

November 2021
For Thanksgiving, Joe Biden pardons the first synthetic turkeys, Beyond and Meat. Anthony Fauci receives from an anonymous 'fan' from Wuhan some mashed potatoes, gravy and
a giant stuffed bat.

December 2021
Austin Mayor Steve Adler gets the Nobel Peace Prize for seceding from Texas four months after Texas' secession from the US.

Seriously, I do wish everyone of us a very, very, very happy new year 2022.



 
blogules 2020
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* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020), "Happy New Year 2022" (Dec 2020)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020), "Bonne année 2022" (Dec 2020).

** see "Happy New Year 2021 (a bit belated, but there was a shortage of blogules)"

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