20201216

Happy New Year 2022

It's that time of the year*, and I won't skip my duties after what happened last year (ICYMI** for the first time in a decade, I skipped my worst wishes exorcism... which obviously caused that awful 2020). 

So as usual, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2021:

January 2021
On January 20th, at the very moment Joe Biden is inaugurated, Donald Trump announces his candidacy for 2024, followed one hour later by Ivanka and Don Jr. Before sunset, Eric withdraws from the Grand Old Parody primaries, Barron launches a PAC for 2032, and Melania files for divorce.

February 2021
Ireland welcomes the first refugees from Britain following the Great Brexit Famine.

March 2021
To defend them during their trial, the murderers of George Floyd hire the KKK's Grand Wizard. All get additional jail time for not wearing a mask, the Grand Wizard for refusing to remove his hood. Once exposed, Stephen Miller leaves his job to Rudy Giuliani for the lawyer part, the KKK side going to The Donald.

April 2021
Raul Castro leaves power. The Trump family offers to rule for the next 62 years.

May 2021
Eurovision contest returns. In protest, Europe returns to lockdown.

June 2021
Donald Trump wins the presidential elections in Iran. Ali Khamenei demands a recount.

July 2021
After a second cancellation of the Tokyo 2020 Olympics, the first Medical Olympics are held in Japan. Moderna must return its gold medal following a failed doping test (
anabolic hydroxychloroquine).

August 2021
As he celebrates his landslide win at the Ethiopian elections, Xi Jinping announces the postponement of Hong Kong's vote from September 2021 to October 2047.

September 2021
At long last, Angela Merkel is free to go wild, do and say whatever she fancies. The now former Chancellor immediately returns to the university to further study science and Russian. Donald Trump's comment on Twitter: 'What a loser. instead, I would play golf all day. Hell, I even prefer watching TV all day here in Rykers Island.'

October 2021
A popular uprising removes Jair Bolsonaro from power after he pledged to destroy the last remaining section of the Amazonian rainforest (a six square foot patch near a mass burial site).

November 2021
For Thanksgiving, Joe Biden pardons the first synthetic turkeys, Beyond and Meat. Anthony Fauci receives from an anonymous 'fan' from Wuhan some mashed potatoes, gravy and
a giant stuffed bat.

December 2021
Austin Mayor Steve Adler gets the Nobel Peace Prize for seceding from Texas four months after Texas' secession from the US.

Seriously, I do wish everyone of us a very, very, very happy new year 2022.



 
blogules 2020
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* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020), "Happy New Year 2022" (Dec 2020)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020), "Bonne année 2022" (Dec 2020).

** see "Happy New Year 2021 (a bit belated, but there was a shortage of blogules)"

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