Happy New Year 2024

It's that time of the year*, and as usual, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2023:

January 2023

Xi Jinping declares the pandemic over as China achieves herd immunity with only 271,564,888 fatalities. Some suspect the actual tally could be twice as high.

February 2023

On the anniversary of the invasion of Ukraine, and following a referendum held at the Russian Embassy in D.C., the United States are officially annexed by Russia. 

March 2023

Hours after Vladimir Putin is assassinated by an aide, Amerika Oblast declares its independence from Russia. All Russian troops withdraw from Ukraine and Georgia.

April 2023

Key collaborators to the 2023 insurrection, Donald Trump, Tucker Carson, and Ted Cruz are arrested just before boarding a plane for Cancun: 'you can't touch me', says the 45th POTUS, 'I'm a Russian diplomat and Vladimir gave me this Russian passport to prove it'. In retaliation, the  Republican House votes to impeach Joe Biden for collusion with Ukraine.

May 2023

Great Britain celebrates the coronation of her new king. William III pays a vibrant tribute to his late father, crushed during the rehearsals of his own big day: "that crown was definitely too heavy for poor Charles III".

June 2023

In Turkey, all opposition candidates are jailed ahead of the general elections. Erdogan claims victory with 125% of the votes: 'I scored a bit lower that the latest polls predicted, but that proves how rock solid our democracy is.'

July 2023 

The US Supreme Court reinstates Scott v. Sandford, making slavery once again legal in the US. Ron DeSantis applauds the decision: 'I'll send even more illegal migrants to Washington - soon I'll need to get some work done on my White House'.

August 2023 

Elon Musk still hasn't found his successor to lead Twitter; he never really looked for one, and both Kanye West and the QAnon Shaman rejected the offer.

September 2023 

Following Pope Francis' trip to Africa, the head of the Church and 80% of his potential successors die of Ebola in the Vatican Cluster.

October 2023 

One year later, Rishi Sunak is still Prime Minister. And still the wealthiest man in the Kingdom, with twenty five billion pounds (around one thousand four hundred US dollars).

November 2023 

Joe Biden declares his candidacy to succeed Pope Francis and wins in a landslide. Pete Buttigieg thanks Kamala Harris for picking him: 'an Asian African American woman President and a gay Hoosier Veep... America is alive and ticking boxes!'

December 2023 

Mayor Lori Lightfoot laments in front of an almost dried up Lake Michigan: "60 degrees on Christmas Day. Over zero, and in Celsius... yet climate change did nothing for that damned wind."

blogules 2022
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com.

 

* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020), "Happy New Year 2022" (Dec 2020), "Happy New Year 2023" (Dec 2021), "Happy New Year" (Dec 2022)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020), "Bonne année 2022" (Dec 2020), "Bonne année 2023" (Dec 2021), "Bonne année 2024" (Dec 2022).

Happy New Year 2023

It's that time of the year*, and as usual, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2022:

January 2022
On January 6, the Capitol is stormed again: hundreds of Trump loyalists demand all insurrectionist GOP lawmakers to follow them in jail. Comments from the pack leader, 'QAnon Shaman' Jake Angeli: "I know that for this party the little guys are always supposed to pay for the big guys, but today, we the base say that the time has come for some trickle-up politics".

February 2022
Queen Elizabeth II's Platinum Jubilee draws more viewers than the opening ceremony of the Winter Olympics. In parallel to Beijing 2022, a parody Squid Game Season 2022 runs on all major networks to expose the regime's human rights abuses with an all time record of audience for the gold medal final in Blood-curling. "This is an insult to our philanthropic institution", cries Thomas Bach. "We at the Communist Party of China always preferred red to pink".

March 2022
The WHO secretly hopes that with the next variant, Psi, the pandemic will shrink.

April 2022
This time, Vladimir Putin wins the French presidential elections. Not with one of his expected candidates (Le Pen, Zemmour, Melenchon etc), but with some obscure conspiracy theorist youtuber pushing his Yellow Vest / Antivax / Flat Earth platform.

May 2022
Olaf Scholz wins the Eurovision contest: "at last I made the international headlines. Now I've got to convince people that I replaced Angela Merkel".

June 2022
India becomes the most populated nation on Earth. To protest, Xi Jinping blocks all water coming from the Himalaya: "Let's call it a drought".

July 2022
If NASA officially recognizes Donald Trump as an astronaut, the former president keeps fuming: "my quickie in Jeff Bezos' elevator went BAD. I invited a few playmates to have some fun in total weightlessness, but that golden shower was a TOTAL MESS!"

August 2022
Climate change refugees flock from Florida. Says one: "just when we refurbished our 16-bedroom villa by the sea, we lost the Keys..."

September 2022
To celebrate the bicentennial of Brazil's independence, the people ejects Jair Bolsonaro from power. "We would have beheaded him, if only he had a head to begin with".

 

October 2022
In one day, all financial markets plummet by 50%, all cryptocurrencies by 95%. No billionaire is seriously hurt.

 

November 2022
GQP wins the Midterm Elections by a landslide with 40% of the vote. Qatar wins its soccer World Cup without losing a game, its striker Jerry Mander finishing best scorer.

 

December 2022
The Nobel Peace Prize goes to 3 recipients:
- Vladimir Putin for ending the Russia-Ukraine conflict by anschlussing Ukraine
- the Talibans for ending the gender war by suppressing all non male genders
- Boris Johnson for ending the year with the mother of all covid parties

Seriously, I do wish everyone of us a very, very, very happy new year 2022.

 
blogules 2021
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com.

* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020), "Happy New Year 2022" (Dec 2020), "Happy New Year 2023" (Dec 2021)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020), "Bonne année 2022" (Dec 2020), "Bonne année 2023" (Dec 2021).

Happy New Year 2022

It's that time of the year*, and I won't skip my duties after what happened last year (ICYMI** for the first time in a decade, I skipped my worst wishes exorcism... which obviously caused that awful 2020). 

So as usual, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2021:

January 2021
On January 20th, at the very moment Joe Biden is inaugurated, Donald Trump announces his candidacy for 2024, followed one hour later by Ivanka and Don Jr. Before sunset, Eric withdraws from the Grand Old Parody primaries, Barron launches a PAC for 2032, and Melania files for divorce.

February 2021
Ireland welcomes the first refugees from Britain following the Great Brexit Famine.

March 2021
To defend them during their trial, the murderers of George Floyd hire the KKK's Grand Wizard. All get additional jail time for not wearing a mask, the Grand Wizard for refusing to remove his hood. Once exposed, Stephen Miller leaves his job to Rudy Giuliani for the lawyer part, the KKK side going to The Donald.

April 2021
Raul Castro leaves power. The Trump family offers to rule for the next 62 years.

May 2021
Eurovision contest returns. In protest, Europe returns to lockdown.

June 2021
Donald Trump wins the presidential elections in Iran. Ali Khamenei demands a recount.

July 2021
After a second cancellation of the Tokyo 2020 Olympics, the first Medical Olympics are held in Japan. Moderna must return its gold medal following a failed doping test (anabolic hydroxychloroquine).

August 2021
As he celebrates his landslide win at the Ethiopian elections, Xi Jinping announces the postponement of Hong Kong's vote from September 2021 to October 2047.

September 2021
At long last, Angela Merkel is free to go wild, do and say whatever she fancies. The now former Chancellor immediately returns to the university to further study science and Russian. Donald Trump's comment on Twitter: 'What a loser. instead, I would play golf all day. Hell, I even prefer watching TV all day here in Rykers Island.'

October 2021
A popular uprising removes Jair Bolsonaro from power after he pledged to destroy the last remaining section of the Amazonian rainforest (a six square foot patch near a mass burial site).

November 2021
For Thanksgiving, Joe Biden pardons the first synthetic turkeys, Beyond and Meat. Anthony Fauci receives from an anonymous 'fan' from Wuhan some mashed potatoes, gravy and a giant stuffed bat.

December 2021
Austin Mayor Steve Adler gets the Nobel Peace Prize for seceding from Texas four months after Texas' secession from the US.

Seriously, I do wish everyone of us a very, very, very happy new year 2022.

 
blogules 2020
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)
Enjoyed my neuroses? Check my prose: dragedies.com.

* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020), "Happy New Year 2022" (Dec 2020)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020), "Bonne année 2022" (Dec 2020).

** see "Happy New Year 2021 (a bit belated, but there was a shortage of blogules)"

Happy New Year 2021 (a bit belated, but there was a shortage of blogules)

Sorry about this coronavirus: it's all my fault. 

Since 2008, I used to exorcise each upcoming year by wishing you a happy next year*, but as last December was drawing to an end, for some reason I wasn't in a mood for humor. So I didn't wish you a happy new year 2021, and you got stuck to my crappy "Happy New Year 2020" announcing the calamities to plague 2019... 

Well it didn't fail: now we're all trapped in this abominable 2020. And the guy who wrote that one didn't waste time in subtleties: where I try to limit the bad news to one category per month, alternating between politics, economy, or social issues, this maniac drops the full package all the way, the pedal to the metal. You enjoyed March 2020? April will be even worse, thank you very much.

So don't forget to stay at home, and to wash your hands.

But please, don't forget to laugh at least a couple of times every day, and to smile kindly each time you circumnavigate strangers coming your way to respect safety distances - you're not doing that out of fear of others, but out of love for everyone.

From the bottom of my heart, I wish every single one of us a very very very happy new year 2021.

blogules 2020
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)



* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019), "Happy New Year 2021" (Apr 2020)... et en Francais: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne Année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019), "Bonne année 2021" (Avr 2020).

Happy New Year 2020

It's that time of the year*, and I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2019:

January 2019
During their first week in charge, House Democrats issue a combined 3,320 subpoenas (over 500 each for Adam Schiff, Elijah Cummings, Jerrold Nadler, Maxine Waters, and Richard Neal) for past and present members of the Trump administration. Meanwhile, Robert Mueller starts investigating GOP lawmakers blackmailed with kompromat by Putin and Trump. Lindsey Graham, Devin Nunes, and other powerful figures abruptly flee for Brazil, where Jair Bolsonaro grants them political asylum.

February 2019
Facing prison charges, Benjamin Netanyahu takes the first plane for Brasilia.

March 2019
No blessing from lawmakers, no referendum, no deal, but no no Brexit either: the UK crashes out of the Union with the only consolation that Theresa May will no longer be in 10 Downing Street (the building being sold to pay part of the EUR 55 bn fine, the PM moves in 221B Baker Street). Boris Johnson parades at the 2019 Rio Carnival on the Monstrosity float:

April 2019
The day Akihito abdicates, Nippon Kaigi and Shinzo Abe have Naruhito, Akishino, and Hisahito murdered to install on the throne an obscure member of the Imperial Family compliant with their lifetime dream to restore fascism. At Japan's top military academy, the new Emperor welcomes his first Head of State with a vibrant homage: 'we do have a lot to learn from people like Jair Bolsonaro'.

May 2019
Vladimir Putin wins the European Elections in every single member state, the Gilets Jaunes Party claiming 41% of the ballot in France, and Marine Le Pen's movement 33%.

June 2019
In North Korea, Mount Paektu explodes, allowing KIM Jong-un to get six more unnoticed nuclear tests before going on a trek along the Amazon river, joined by Bashar al Assad the time for chemical weapons to dissipate across Kurdistan.

July 2019
Metoo: France wins the Women's FIFA World Cup at home just days after five players of the male team get jailed for domestic abuse.

August 2019
Coldest month of August on record: global warming takes a short pause thanks to Korea's nuclear winter.

September 2019
The day Mike Pence is forced to quit by Mueller Probe revelations, Donald Trump is impeached. Nancy Pelosi is sworn in, with Vice President Beto O'Rourke by her side. Jeff Flake declares his candidacy for 2020, then withdraws after being spotted in the same elevator as Brett Kavanaugh.

October 2019
At long last, Vladimir Putin wins the Nobel Peace Prize for restoring eternal peace in Syria.

November 2019
Only the third asset collapse of the year for China, but XI Jinping still believes he can, like the US, pull a fifth one by the end of the year.

December 2019
Carlos Ghosn is re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-arrested. Japan gives up all hope of getting a confession from him, and extradite the Brazilian back home, where Jair The First puts him in charge of the merger of Brazil with Hungary.


blogules 2019
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)

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* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017), "Happy New Year 2020" (Jan 2019)... and in French: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017), "Bonne année 2020" (Jan 2019).

Happy New Year 2019

It's that time of the year, and for the 21st time*, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2018:

January 2018:
Full mailbox for Donald Trump on the morning of the 20th: 1 letter congratulating him for his first year in office (From Russia With Love, signed by The Former Spy Who Still Loves You), 457 letters of resignation from White House staffers who completed the full year required for their résumés, 3,580 letters of candidacy from child molesters with the required KKK kredentials.

February 2018:
As announced, the US wait until the end of the Pyeongchang Olympics to launch preemptive strikes against North Korea. The new Secretary of State, Mike Pompeo, 'apologizes' for not including the Paralympics: 'Our bad, but thanks to us, people with disabilities will have even more airtime'. If all targets are destroyed, they only represented a fraction of Kim Jong-un's arsenal, and Seoul is destroyed minutes after the first strike. By the end of the day, the whole peninsula is flattened. Hundreds of millions of Americans will only learn months later that, in retaliation, they've been poisoned by chemicals spread in their water systems by sleeping cells.

March 2018:

Science: the Russia Probe is successfully sent to Mars by the GOP Congress.

April 2018:
As asset bubbles keep popping, World Leaders convene in Moscow around a freshly reelected Vladimir Putin. Xi, Erdogan, Abe, Duterte, Modi, Trump, and their friends agree to focus on the reforms that should have remained their only priority: undermining their respective democracies. 

May 2018:
Prince Harry marries Meghan Markle dressed as a Minion, the mildest set she could find in his collection of Nazi uniforms, Stormtrooper gears, and Britain First Party costumes.

June 2018:
Saudi women are allowed to drive, but only driverless cars that are fully covered with an opaque burqa.

July 2018:
Not a single goal scored during the whole FIFA World Cup in Russia... an unexpected consequence of net neutrality.

August 2018:
From al Qaeda to ISIS to Idiotheocracy: the latest terror franchise to rise from the ashes of the precedent one has further dumbed down the message of fundamentalism to the most basic grunts, facilitating the merger with extremists from other religions. Their propaganda videos soon go viral among hardcore Teletubbies fans.

September 2018:
The POTUS realizes that trying to cast away investigations against him didn't work: Robert Mueller (from Mars), and Trump's victims of sexual harassment (from Venus) manage to revive the threats of impeachment. Looking for new diversions, DJT reveals the plans of the future US Embassy in East Jerusalem, inaugurates statues of the Klan Founders in the Rose Garden, and starts WWIV against Iran.

October 2018:
As soon as Theresa May resigns, the British Pound spikes to 312,788 Bitcoin, that's to say one millionth of a zimbabwean dollar, or the equivalent of half a second of work in North Korean slave wages.

November 2018:
Landslide victory for Mainstream Republicans at the mid-term elections: 'Our top donors kindly rewarded us for the generous tax cuts we offered them', triumphes Mitch McConnell. 'We're also glad that the GOP managed to end in the third position - we need all the votes of the Gropers Offshore Party'. The former Democratic Party also failed to reunite,  Progressives finishing a distant second, and the RNC fifth, far behind the Green Party, even after Hillary Clinton raised record funds for her Rhodam National Convention.

December 2018:
And the Nobel Peace Prize goes to... AlphaGo. The World's most powerful A.I. platform solved all conflicts, all famines, and all environmental and refugee crises by removing mankind.


blogules 2017
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)




* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016), "Happy New Year 2019" (Dec 2017)... and in French: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne année 2018" (Dec 2016), "Bonne année 2019" (Dec 2017).

Happy New Year 2018

It's that time of the year, and for the 18th time*, I have no choice but to wish you a happy next year, considering what's going to happen in 2017:


January 2017:

On the 20th, Vladimir Putin is sworn in as the 45th POTUS.
Donald Trump is swearing in the background.

February 2017:

In the final moments of Superbowl LI in Houston, the Moscow Hackers upset the New York Trumps as Barron Trump fumbles Mike Pence's Hail Mary pass.

March 2017:

Theresa May triggers Article 50, but Brexit backfires, and the UK lands into a limbo known as Breshold.

April 2017:


Galaxy S8 sells like hotcakes, and as hotcake warmers. Meanwhile, Apple celebrates its 100,000th iPhone 7 explosion without a recall, and Huawei posts record sales of its latest stylus, the Frying Pen.

May 2017:

In the French presidential elections, Putin friend Francois Fillon defeats Putin-friendly Marine Le Pen. After so many good news, Vladimir Putin dies of a heart attack.

June 2017:

The 46th President of the United States, Mike Pence, scares Ruth Bader Ginsburg to death before nominating a fundamentalist to replace her.

July 2017:

Vice-President Donald Trump and former Vice-President Dan Quayle form a rock band called 'The Unpresidented Potatoe'.

August 2017:

Usain Bolt is prevented from taking part to the Athletics World Championships in London, and a Luxembourgian wins the 100 meter dash following the publication of JamaicaLeaks, RussiaLeaks, AmericaLeaks, and Breleaks.

September 2017:

Following successful terror/ fake news campaigns fueled by ISIS, Dmitry Medvedev, and Breitbart Deutschland, Angela Merkel loses the German federal elections to Frauke Petry (AfD), who invites Donald Trump to her victory lap in Nuremberg.

October 2017:

At long last, JFK assassination records are disclosed. DJT says he'll release his tax returns in 2070.

November 2017:


A few months into power, the new South Korean president is impeached following the revelation that he was the only leader of a democracy not to be under the influence of Russia.

December 2017:

The Nobel Peace Prize goes to Rodrigo Duterte. Russia denies any involvement in the hacking of the Nobel Committee.


blogules 2016
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)

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* see "Happy New Year 2010" (Jan 2009), "Happy New Year 2011" (Dec 2009), "Happy New Year 2012" (Dec 2010), "Happy New Year 2013" (Dec 2011), "Happy New Year 2014" (Dec 2012), "Happy New Year 2015" (Dec 2013), "Happy New Year 2016" (Dec 2014), "Happy New Year 2017" (Dec 2015), "Happy New Year 2018" (Dec 2016)... and in French: "Bonne Année 2009" (Jan 2008), "Bonne Année 2010" (Dec 2008), "Bonne Année 2011" (Dec 2009), "Bonne Année 2012" (Dec 2010), "Bonne Année 2013" (Dec 2011), "Bonne Année 2014" (Dec 2012), "Bonne Année 2015" (Dec 2013), "Bonne Année 2016" (Dec 2014), "Bonne année 2017" (Dec 2015), "Bonne année 2018" (Dec 2016).