Smile, you're on Candid Democracy

Elba Esther Gordillo
Head of National Education Workers' Union
Mexico (1989-2013)
Faces justice for embezzling $ 156 M

Silvio Berlusconi
Prime Minister
Italy (1994-95, 2001-06, 2008-11...)
Faces justice for tax evasion, corruption, bribery, abuse of power, soliciting minors for sex, Zlatanic cleansing of AC Milan...

Nip, tuck, corrupt...

Smile, you're on Candid Democracy


blogules 2013
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)

Angry Birds - Acropolis

Can European leaders destroy the Greek landmark, move to the next level, and break their debt records ? This version of the "Angry Birds" game looks rather easy.

The dream team is ready:
- first you've got the small red bird, the EU. You know, the whatchacallit stuff around the EuroZone, where David Cameron is sometimes invited to give a speech. Totally powerless, but if it keeps knocking at your door it can cause some damage.
- then there's the yellow bird, Sarkozy. A pointed face and a crooked walk, but it can suddenly accelerate and crash head first into whatever's on its way. Spectacular, but it can't huff and puff a real wall down all by himself.
- now the big red bird, that's a completely different story. That's Merkel. It's slow and heavy, and it doesn't move often... but when it does, even the hearth trembles.
- another bird that can cause havoc ? The black one, Berlusconi. A touchy thing that can't fly far, but when it lands it simply explodes and destroys everything.
- I almost forgot to mention the blue bird, the Baltic states. From a distance it looks like a tiny small fella, until you realize there are three of them. Still not very powerful, but boy can they break'em glass ceilings !
- but the bird that's the closest to finish the game is the white one, Papandreou. This egghead moves slowly, then drops his bomb, and escapes in a hurry.

Next level : Angry Birds - Roma.

blogules 2011

Of haircut and hair-splitting trends in Europe

Here are the main decisions taken in Brussels by Eurozone leaders :
- Greece is saved : since George Papandreou was already almost bald, banks will get the haircuts. And as the first country to adopt the new SubEuro, Greece shall inaugurate S&P's new rating systems (phi beta kappAAA)
- Italy is saved : Silvio Berlusconi's ratings will not be downgraded (BungabungAAA+)
- France is saved : andouillettes will keep their most attractive labels (AAAAA)
- Germany is saved : Angela Merkel will control the European Financial Stability Facility (EFSF). She already mandated her new finance minister, Herman Cain, to implement his latest 9-9-9 formula (9% Bitburger, 9% Tsingtao, 9% CaipirinhAAA+)
- the UK is saved : David Cameron will become King of the Northern half of the NonEuroZone and the nation enjoy its specific ratings (USAAA-)
- the Euro is saved : as soon as Mario Draghi succeeds Jean-Claude Trichet as head of the ECB, all junk bonds shall be handled by Naples Waste Managment Offshore Limited (CamorrAAA+)

Not everyone agrees.

Ever the rebel and the haircut and hair-splitting diva, Paris Hilton decided to initiate the Occupy Rodeo Drive movement. And in order to fend off police forces who may try to prevent her from raiding shops, she can count on her latest Fendi Hit Bag.

blogules 2011

WikiLeakified

blogule's Agence Fausse Presse managed to snatch from PeepeeLeaks a few top secret cables where several US envoys deliver their impressions about key world leaders:

- Nicolas Sarkozy : "A paranoid in love with the States, or rather obsessed with the need to be loved by Tom Cruise. Instills terror into his staff : no one dares criticize him, and he's been replacing them one by one by Oompas Loompas who call him "Your Highness", "Your Greatness", or "Dear Ladder". Now Sarkozy only refers to himself in third person."

- Silvio Berlusconi : "Like many statesmen, an eternal teenager obsessed with new conquests... which in spite of compulsive plastic surgery he needs to pay for. Told us to kiss Don Vito hello, and to thank him for his last delivery of Ukrainian blondes."

- Mahmoud Ahmadinejad : "A narcissic psychopath lunatic. Likely to be good friends with our President George W. Bush."

- Tony Blair : "Very friendly but on the threshold of annoyingness. Insisted to show us his self-flagellation stigmata. Asked again for that seance with Churchill promised by the POTUS."

- Vladimir Putin : "When he enters the room, temperature drops 20 degrees. Each of his muscles is so tensed he constantly needs to tune them like piano strings... quite an experience: his face doesn't move one bit, but every five to six seconds you can hear a 'pling' or a 'plong'."

- Muammar al Gaddafi : "Couldn't meet him: the elevator got stuck between the 4th and 5th floors of his tent."

- Hu Jintao / Wen Jiabao : "The former has the sense of humor of a prison door. No wonder he wants to get rid of the latter, a brillant man with a constant smile on his face. But last time I had tea at Wen's (as usual a very pleasant afternoon), I found out back home that he'd planted about eight hundred acupuncture needles all over my back."

- Saddam Hussein : "Didn't understand why we got rid of him after all he did for us and we for him. Didn't like our farewell gift, a beautiful Lanvin hemp necktie."

blogules 2010 - initially published on blogules VF as "WikiLeakefie".

G20 on Twitter

@barackobama.com : "uh... hem... Look : 120 characters left. Good day : we reached an agreement. Bonus: prevented a fight btwn Sarko and Hu."

@nicolassarkozy.fr : "Good day : I made the headlines and saved the World as usual. Bonus : prevented war btwn US & China."

@hujintao.com.cn : "Good day : saved Macau & HK, purchased the US, cut ties btwn France & Dalai Lama. Bonus: spied UK in the process."

@gordonbrown.co.uk : "Good day : managed to kept my chin up, and my jaw not too low."

@tayyiperdogan.com.tr : "Good day : Shimon Peres wasn't there."

@robertzoellick.us : "Good day : if a Bushite like me gets a hike during this slump, there's still hope for easy money."

@bankimoon.un.org : "Good day : wish we had the same cast at the Security Council."

@abhisitvejjajiva.com.th : "Good day : was right behind Obama on the photo. Bad day : his smiles eclipsed mine."

@taroaso.co.jp : "Good day : wasn't caught sippin' sake."

@dmitrymedvedev.ru : "Good day : I kept those morons busy while Vlady nuked Georgia. Even got an Obama autograph."

@stephenharper.ca : "Bad day : got locked in the johns during the official photo op."

@mbtious.co.kr : "Good day : Kim Jong-il helped me get an itw w. BO."

@lula.com.br : "Good day : was hired as a bodyguard for Brown and the Queen. Kept that French lunatic away from Barack."

@angelamerkel.de : "Good day : was seated next to Oby for dinner, far from Sarko on the final picture."

@dskimf.com : "Good day : I got a budget to purchase flowers for Michelle Obama."

@silvioberlusconi.it : "Good day for plastic surgery : on the pixes, I look younger than Obama and Medvedev combined."

@kevinrudd.com.au : "G'day and seeya."

Red blogule to Silvio Desperate Jail Life Berlusconi

This man just can't stand losing. Even Karl Rove and a Florida scenario didn't help him keep his job. Now he wants to build a grand national coalition, provoque new elections, do anything to escape judgement day.
His right wing partners are ready to wage a gerrilla against the future government, which tells how much they care for the country compared to their own interests. Berlusconi already spent the bulk of his ruling time increasing and protecting his wealth, devoting his energy to an indecent fight against law.
Prodi is weak enough to be overwhelmed by Hurricane Silvio but how strong is Italian democracy ?