Exclusive fake interview with Vladimir Putin

Yesterday, I met in person Vladimir Putin at the Kremlin for an exclusive fake interview with my Agence Fausse Presse. We actually chatted over the phone, since we were each seated at one end of a 75-meter-long marble table.

blogules - 'Thank you for having me for breakfast, and not on the menu'.

Vladimir Putin - 'You're welcome. And don't worry, I don't eat people. Ukrainians do. They're genocidal, war-mongering neo-nazi cannibals, kabbalist pedophiles, and they always distort the truth.'

b - 'If I may, you're the blood-thisrty war-monger pushing massive disinformation campaigns and spreading totally outrageous lies about Ukraine. And as far as neo-nazis go, you're the one helping Assad gas his own people, you're the one playing the Hitler playbook with a fallacious story about 'liberating' Ukraine, just like Adolf invaded Poland under the fake pretext that its German minorities suffered from persecution.'

VP - 'Don't push your luck, I may reconsider my vegetarian habits for breakfast... I'm not Hitler. I'm just a Russian leader defending Russian interests. We're the ones who defeated Hitler, remember?'

b - 'Stalin did play a decisive role in defeating Nazi Germany. He was also a ruthless dictator and Imperialist who spread war across the globe and was responsible for millions of Russian deaths.'

VP - 'I'm not Stalin. I'm not a communist.'

b - 'But you never swallowed the fall of the Soviet Union. Like Hitler with 1919, you're obsessed with reversing 1991.'

VP - 'Russia goes beyond regimes. The Tsars passed, the USSR passed, Russia remains.'

b - 'Putism will pass. Heck, it doesn't even exist. Do you consider yourself like one of the Great Tsars, the way Erdogan pretends to be a Great Sultan or Xi Jinping acts like the new Emperor?'

VP - 'I'm not Ivan The Terrible. My business model is more the mob.'

b - 'Exactly. You don't have a system to sustain or to survive you, you're using smokescreens of ideologies, nationalism, religion, or such obsolete symbols as the Cossacks to cement your power and your image, but basically you're just a mob boss.'

VP - 'I'm simply the G.O.A.T. I don't even have lieutenants or deputies. For the power, I have my KGB-FSB circle at home, and thugs like Ramzan Kadyrov or Alexander Lukashenko nearby. For the money, I have oligarchs: I keep them alive, away from jail, and rich, they give me a fat cut on their wealth. Now I'm much richer than Musk, Bezos, and Zuckerberg combined. And these losers only have paper when I have gold, properties, real assets. I don't have shareholders to answer to, and my rockets can have a significantly greater impact than their baby boy toys'

b - 'Your nukes definitely can. When you put the World on high nuclear alert, when you threaten even Sweden and Finland, are you deliberately playing the 'mad man', or have you gone full paranoid, on a Nero-tic path? Even if, one day, you win in Ukraine, aren't you already losing it? I mean where's the charming, fit, acute strategic thinker these days? We can only see a vulgar, puffed up egotist with serious anger management issues. Is it steroids? Are you sick, physically and/or mentally?'

VP - 'You, for sure, are utterly crazy. You must know that disrespectful journalists don't live old here.'

b - 'I never pretended to be a journalist.'

VP - 'Well you know how I treat comedians. Ask Volodymyr Zelensky.'

b - 'I never pretended to be a comedian. And Zelensky is not an actor anymore. Unlike you, he's a genuine patriot.'

VP - 'I'm a patriot. You may not know it yet, but Russia has been renamed Putinia. And Saint Petersburg Putingrad. And no, I'm not stopping at Georgia, Ukraine or Sweden. I must reclaim control of the States and put my thug back on the throne.'

b - 'All you're managing to do is to make the EU and NATO relevant and strong again. Trump failed to destroy NATO for you, and Biden will not let that happen.'

VP - 'Joe Biden is already out. My Republican Party is doing a great job at destroying American democracy from the inside, and my local disinformation machine has never been damaged. As for Europe, I still control it.'

b - 'Are you kidding?'

VP - 'Never with business. Germany? Dope pushers hooked to my fossil fuel. And that Olaf Scholz is such a joke... Like Macron, he just came for his national credentials. Macron is not dumb, he doesn't get confrontational. He knows I didn't want him to win in 2017, he knows how easily I got rid of Juppe and Barnier in the primaries (yeah, this year, I had to make dead people and even a dog vote, but still no sweat), he knows how I can destroy him by putting gullible masses on the street. Yellow Jackets, antivaxxers.... piece of cake. But Macron also knows how to flatter egos. Look how he impressed Trump with the Invalides and that military show. Look how he had me tour Versailles and our new Russian Spiritual and Cultural Center in Paris - by the way the mayor was so easy to corrupt on that one. Did you see how the golden dome of my church outshines the Eiffel Tower along the Seine river? How could you frogs let that happen?'

b - 'I see. Let's not even talk about the UK...'

VP - 'I sent them back to the Jurassic with Brexit, and Boris Johnson is clearly more a Fred Flintstone than a T-rex. We own London, corrupted it to the core, and they won't have the guts to pull the plug. I'm not worried about sanctions anyway. We've got them all already sorted out with Jinping, Narendra, and Ali (that's Khamenei).'

b - 'If you always have your usual partners overseas, you're losing support at home. Old Russians in rural areas may buy your propaganda, but the urban youth knows that you won't be here forever, and more and more people start questioning your mental state...'

VP - 'Bah. I'll probably have to create yet another hostage crisis. You know, like at the Moscow Theater or at that Breslan school. Nothing like it to boost the ratings. Otherwise, I can still lose a few more millions Russians; our demographics are not so good anyways. Yes, they can't be all put to rest with a gallon of vodka, like I did with Boris Yeltsin, but I already got rid of hundreds of thousands during the pandemic. Only 'good citizens' got good vaccines. Why do you think we push antivaxxers, beyond undermining Western democracies? We need to compensate our lousy vaxxes, so if they're 60-70% efficient only, turning 30-40% of your populations into antivaxxers brings you and your economies down to our level.'

b - 'And as for more surgical strikes, who's the next Alexei Navalny on your hit list beyond Zelensky, Vitali Klitschko, and friends?' 

VP - 'Adam Kinzinger. Couldn't find any kompromat on him. I had kilometers of reels for Lindsey Graham, and Mitch McConnell only required wads of cash, but this guy is a disgrace for my new and improved GOP.'

b - 'So what do you have about Trump?'

VP - 'A lot of kompromat, but I don't even need that to manipulate this pathetic loser. Not even all the money we gave him to keep him afloat, or his ties to the Mafia. You know, this crybaby truly dreams of becoming a mob boss too. How cute.'

b - 'I also have questions about human rights and the environment.'

VP - 'I don't have time to answer. Anyway you know where I stand: I don't care about human rights, and I'm a strong believer in climate change.'

b - '?!?'

VP - 'I'm investing in facilities to harvest the methane liberated by the melting permafrost, and accelerating climate change to anschluss all arctic routes. Since all the icecap has already melted, we had to plant our flags on the ocean floor.

b - 'But then, where will you organize the Winter Olympics in 2036?'

VP - 'In Alaska. Ivanka has already agreed to sell it to us during her fourth mandate. Now you must go.'

b - 'Okay. I guess thank you for being as honest as an expert propagandist dictator can be.'

VP - 'You're welcome. And obviously you liked the breakfast. Did you know my granddad cooked for Lenin and Stalin? I saw you ate all the cookies, but could you taste the Novichok?'

blogules 2022
Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French)
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The Rising Sun Flag Brought Shame Upon Japan - Ban It

There is no debate whatsover about the Nazi flag in Germany: glorifying this symbol of abomination is a crime, as the "use of symbols of unconstitutional organisations".

Imperial Japan's Rising Sun flag is as infamous as the Nazi swastika, and yet there is no law to prevent its use. Worse: part of Japan's "Self-Defense Forces" - you know, the ones supposed to remain 'defensive' whatever happens - have been using a variant as their official flag for decades. Even worse: Imperial Japan's war crimes were never recognized by any Japanese institution and nowadays, praising Imperial Japan or denying its war crimes is not only tolerated, but the only way to succeed as a politician in Japan.

Of course, you cannot expect the fascist clique that controls this peaceful nation and tries very hard to reverse the constitution back to Imperial Japan's bellicose mode, the government that just unveiled a "destroyer" flying the dreaded colors, to ban this Rising Sun flag.

The parade followed the controversial South Korea - Japan soccer game where Japanese nationalists waved the Rising Sun and Korean nationalists the portrait of a resistant to Imperial Japan, and a banner stating in Korean "The nation that forgets history has no future", a direct reference to the incredible revisionist tsunami washing over the archipelago*. Infuriated, the Japanese extreme right confirmed its full support to the flag**.

So what the international community must do is to expose the abomination, and to ask the peaceful people of Japan to rise against the true enemies of their nation, to refuse Shinzo Abe's agenda (see "The main threat against Japan? Its own leader"), and to demand a ban of the Rising Sun flag.

The Rising Sun flag and the Nazi Swastika - These flags brought shame upon Japan and Germany, destruction across the World - Ban them


What could be worse than Shinzo Abe taking care of Japan? Shinzo Abe taking care of Japan AND Fukushima, maybe.



twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/365371757760245760




The Prime Minister decided to step in and help TEPCO deal with the mess because he had no choice: the risks are too high for his government to lose support for his key constitutional reform, he must appear as a strong leader, with a strategic vision.

And you cannot at the same time push as hard as you can in favor of militarism against dubious threats from overseas, and do nothing against massive radioactive leaks at home.

How much time does Shinzo Abe have before the mud hits the fan at the economic or at the environmental level? Hard to tell. Both Abenomics and the handling of the nuclear incidents in Daiichi are more and more criticized as further disasters in the making.

#ShinzoAbe takes a leak (#Fukushima's).
Boy, this man is truly radioactive. #abeignomics
twitter.com/theseoulvillage/status/365355493465669632

blogules 2013 Since 2003, nonsensical posts about noncritical issues in nonenglish (get your blogules transfusion in French) NEW: join blogules on Facebook!!! and Twitter (@stephanemot, @blogules)

* see previous episodes, particularly those featuring Shinzo Abe
** "世界に嘘つきまくる韓国の“奇妙”、横断幕事件でも稚拙な嘘、嘘…身のほどわきまえない“欲深さ”が理由" (Sankei Shimbun 20130808)

Korea needs even more Truth and Reconciliation

In its 2009 International Symposium (see program below*), the Truth and Reconciliation Commission, Republic of Korea (TRCK) collected priceless insights, very comforting for the future of Transitional Justice in Korea and, beyond, for the future of democracy itself.

This country is about to decide which model to follow, with the unique opportunity to not only follow but lead, and even become a role model for all Asia. The Commission has already accomplished a terrific job, and Korea needs it more than ever, not only because more truth needs to come out. But for reconciliation to succeed, Korea needs its government to play its role, to fully support transitional justice as a whole (i.e. beyond the TRCK, the settlement foundation has yet to be established according to the law), and to guarantee the success of national reconciliation. Any failure to do so would definitely send the wrong message to the world about the level of democracy in Korea.

Hopefully, this simply can't happen in this century.

Yesterday, among the cases from Africa, Americas, Africa, and Europe, I expected the most from Rwanda and indeed, ITCR Judge PARK Seon-ki delivered a comprehensive presentation, including precious insights about the local context (i.e. the Gacaca justice system). I only wish he had more time to raise the "national reconciliation" issues, critical in a country where genocide survivors often live in the same village as their torturers.

Dr. Martin Salm (Germany) put the human factor centerstage, and that's a necessity when all you can give to people who lost 3 years of their lives as forced laborers is 500 euros... not much at the micro level, but his EVZ foundation eventually distributed about 5 billion euros to 1.6 million victims across Europe, and that's not petty money. Korea and Japan can learn a lot from this impressive publicly and privately funded international effort, but also from the importance of the care given to grieving individuals often suffering from isolation. Reconciliation is also about replacing bitterness and anger with peace, recognition, and confidence in the future. Strenghtening society and lifting the whole nation instead of letting it rot it in a nationalist dead end. For chaebols often perceived as distant from the people, contributing to this national cause would not only be the high road, but an easy one at that if they want to enhance their own image.

In Korea like everywhere else, victims first need to be officially, and if possible legally, recognised as victims. This usually comes before financial reparations. Condemning methods (beyond potential political / ideological sensibilities) is also essential : the most powerful sentence ever pronounced by Barack Obama is "we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals". Punishing the criminals is yet another level, and Korea will probably fine tune its amnesty / trial ratio. But if much truth remains to be uncovered, the time of reconciliation has come, and that will require pedagogy, sensibility, a lot of work on memory, with visible, tangible, shared elements to not only honor and remember, but also strengthten society and its future.

Honoring the great Latin American literary tradition, former Peruvian Truth and Reconciliation Commission President Salomon Lerner submitted a brilliant text with a universal reach. One can only subscribe to his beautifully crafted focus on the power of words and the clarity of the vision, the importance of "a prudent approach to social expectancies (...) which demands, in turn, a fine and responsible crafting of the discourse and messages", and the need to prolong this writing with "memory, that, in becoming social life and in being fecundated by ethical motivations, becomes a true transformer of history".

I wish Dr. Leigh Payne used a more "responsible crafting of the discourse and messages" in her own conclusions, particularly since those were only temporary conclusions following the first part of her very interesting research on 91 national cases of Transitional Justice. She did use all the right precautions in her speech, but "verba volant, scripta manent", and the slide bluntly singled out TJ systems featuring only truth commissions as potentially "harmful". Such a message could be misunterpreted and thus maybe "harmful" to transitional justice, particularly in countries where truth commissions very existences are threatened... It can be misunderstood and almost sounds like blaming a thermometer for fever : of course, what is "harmful" is the abuses perpetrated, and certainly not the doctor examining the wound and recommanding ways to cure and prevent further damage - what is also "harmful" is the lobby trying to silence the doctor, or to discredit him by depriving him of his most essential tools. TRCs are not into reopening wounds : they are an essential part of the healing process, the guarantee for a better future.

That said, I'm not exactly a model in "fine and responsible crafting of the discourse and messages", and I naturally agree with Dr Payne's results, which look totally logical : Truth Commissions simply cannot work as stand alone tools precisely because they are not meant to work as stand alone tools... except in those countries where they are set up as smoke screens (or rather, as Dr. Payne finely and responsibly put it, "facades"), by governments who want to appear as mature democracies facing their own pasts. That is, fortunately, not the case of Korea, where the TCR was really meant to help the country move to a higher level.

But the TCRK was given a relatively limited reach, and key elements of the Basic Law for the Settlement of Past Incidents have yet to be implemented. Furthermore, the success of the whole system depends on the full support of a government which, these days, can at times appear uncomfortable with transitional justice : as I pointed out earlier**, ultra-conservative die harders keep lobbying against the TCRK, undermining not only Korea's efforts to emerge as a leading nation on the international stage, but also Japan's efforts to at last face its own dark chapters regarding Korea.

Every voice should be heard in the process : as reminded yesterday, that is the essence of democracy. It is not an easy task but there is no other way. The choice is simple : unity or division, reconciliation or hatred, healing or suffering, more democracy or less democracy. And it's binary : not doing anything, letting time pass and tensions rise is equivalent to killing transitional justice altogether.

So the pressure is certainly not on the Truth and Reconciliation Commission, but on the Korean government, who is compelled to give it a total support. By the end of TRCK's mandate, the world will have an answer : either Korea decides to become a model for Asia, or its rulers decide to cast shame upon themselves.


Blogules 2009 (initially published on Seoul Village - Truth and Reconciliation : which model for Korea ?

---
* "The Global Trend of Past Settlement and the Task of Korea to Build National Reconciliation" (20091027) :
Opening Remarks (AHN Byung-ook, President, TRCK)
1. The Justice Balance: When Transitional Justice Improves Human Rights and Democracy (Presentation by Dr. Leigh PAYNE, Professor of Sociology, Oxford University - Questions from AHN Kyong-whan, Professor, SNU and former President of Naitonal Human Rights Commission of Korea)
2. Rwanda Genocide, United Nations International Criminal Tribunal for Rwanda and Lessons from Rwanda and Africa (Presentation by Judge PARK Seon-ki, ITCR - Questions from LEE Suk-tae, Lawyer, Duk Su Law Office)
3. Achievements and Tasks in confronting the Past in Peru and Latin America (Presentation by Dr. Salomon LERNER FEBRES, Rector Emerito, Pontifica Universidad Catolica del Peru and former President of the TRC in Peru - Questions from PARK Koo-byoung, Professor, Ajou University)
4. Will remembrance of National Socialist Crimes never end ? Meaning, tasks, and societal role of the Foundation 'Remembrance, Responsibility and Future' (Presentation by Dr. Martin SALM, Chairman of the Board of Directors, EVZ - Questions from SONG Chung-ki, Professor, Kongju National University)
Wrap up session : Evaluation and Proposal for the Past Settlement of Korea

** see "President Lee, keep digging" followed by "A Common History".

We reject as false the choice between our social security and our ideals

According to Karl Rove*, President Obama would be in "Permanent Campaign". That comes from someone who started campaigning for George W. Bush's 2004 election as soon as he stole the 2000 ballot, and who is still campaigning for his "Bush Legacy", a revisionist's take on one of the darkest periods in US History.

According to Karl Rove, "turning critics into enemies isn't presidential". That comes from a man who had attorneys fired because they were not able to invent proofs against critics of the Bush-Cheney Administration**. Remember those "us vs them" guys ? Were they "Presidential" when they called "axis of weasels" friends who advise you not to invade illegally a country because you may fuel terror worldwide instead of fighting against it ? Were they "Presidential" when they called "un-Americans" patriots who dared point out the possibility that torture, not only performed on innocent people, may not be consistent with American values.

So why is Karl Christian Rove***, a non-presidential individual in Permanent Campaign and turning critics into enemies if I ever saw one, making once again a fool of himself ?

Simply put, this man is scared. Yes, "Turd Blossom" is s..t scared. He knows his long overdue disgrace is coming : he's heading straight to prison, he won't pass go, he won't collect $200, and the few people who would actually like to pay this criminal a visit may turn out to be inmates themselves.

Karl Rove keeps going at "Obama(s)care" because he knows perfectly that once this last major bipartisan effort is over, Eric Holder is free to unleash justice and fix the moral collapse of the Bush-Cheney era.

"Healthscare" is the last throes of Bush-Cheney politics of fear. But this time, the fear is on THEM. And this time, it's not "us vs them" as in "us vs our critics", but "U.S. vs Them" as in "America vs Amerika". This isn't the politics of fear where a corrupt Administration decides who's guilty, but the politics of justice where a sound Administration lets justice do its job independently. Once again, Barack Obama is not pointing the finger at anyone : he is simply showing the direction for Justice ****.

Some think Obama is crazy to tackle health care now, but he doesn't have much choice : it's now or never. You can't mobilize the nation on such a daunting task in the middle of an L or W shaped "recovery". And now, he still needs all aisles of the Congress to work with him.

If you have any doubt about Obama's sense of priorities, just remember the most important words in his inauguration speech ("We reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals") and his first decision as a President (closing Guantanamo).

Change is coming, and the most vocal opponents are those who have the most to fear from justice.

This isn't socialism they're fearing but justice.

Justice against torture and fascism.

Justice against criminals who disgraced American values.

Justice against Nazis who parade freely in a land that defeated Nazism*****.

The time as come to restore American values.

So with hope, we reject as false the choice between our social security and our ideals.


* see "Obama and the Permanent Campaign" (WSJ - 20090813)
** see on NYT "E-Mail Reveals Rove’s Key Role in ’06 Dismissals" (NYT - 20090811)
*** don't get fooled by the middle name : Karl is of the medieval, crusade prone variety - not the "peace and love" kind.
**** see "'Insects placed in a confinement box' (Welcome on Waterboard)"
***** I've often denounced hate groups in America, but they keep coming out crazier than ever as they fear for their own relevance in post-racial America. Depicting Obama as Hitler is typical Goebbels-style propaganda from extremists. On the surrealistic recent developments of the US gun gap, you want to read "

Red blogule to the President who "saves American lives"

President Bush proudly signed the death certificate of Habeas Corpus over a "Protecting Amerika" billboard Joseph Goebbels would have been proud of.

Dubya even dared add this was "a rare occasion when a president can sign a bill he knows will save American lives".

Tell that to the relatives of the 2,783 Americans "saved" from life in Iraq (3,020 overall for what's left of the pretended coalition, according to Iraq Coalition Casualty Count*). Not to mention non-lethal US casualties (somewhere between 30 and 50,000) and of course the 43,937 to 48,783 Iraqis civilians killed because of the US invasion**. So far.

The fact is Bush has never had any occasion of actually saving American lives. Beyond his own, that is, for instance during the Vietnam War as an outfielder Washington Dodger.

I'll tell you what Dubya : not only American lives are not saved, America's soul his being repeatedly tortured and raped by your abject Administration.

As far as I'm concerned, I don't know if I should visit the US again. I love the country but I don't feel secure under a fascist regime where anyone can be abducted anytime anywhere, deprived from any justice, tortured, and even supersized (in Amerika, even Guantanamo residents are overfed with junk food).

* see Icasualties.org.
** see IraqBodyCount.net. President Bush declared The Lancet "not credible" when it announced over 650,000 Iraqi deaths, but The Lancet already was "not credible" for supporting science over creationism, intelligent design and other revisionist theories.

Red blogule to the first amendment - Land of Opportunity for Nazis, Land of Plenty for fascism

Last January, I already blamed the First Amendment for allowing the American National Socialist Movement (a.k.a. America's Nazi Party) to exist an even become a sponsor for the Adopt-A-Highway program.
Now Toledo, OH allowed this mob to march proudly through the city, provoquing a riot and even a curfew. As a result, more publicity than these Nazis could ever dream of - not to mention my blogules.
When I said "let's face it, they're fascists" last year, I was just noticing the similarity between the Mussolini definition of fascism and the Bush Administration's (ab/mis/)use of power. I knew Dubya's reelection would free the darkest sides of Amerika but never did I expect America's Nazi Party to become that bold.
Just a few days ago, Bush would mention for the first time "fascist islamists / fascist islamism". He didn't invent the expression, which perfectly suits the worst part of radical islamists. But still it shocked me to hear Bush using this kind of vocabulary at this stage. Now I know it was a clear signal. We're raising the level of terror threat, but we're also raising the level of permissivity. You may not have the toughest fundamentalist nominated for the Supreme Court, but be sure the country is yours.

Red blogule to US - Japan erasers

As they celebrated the 60th anniversary of liberation from Japan and listened to Koizumi repeat the same empty excuses for an excuse as his predecessor ten years ago, Koreans learned why they couldn't get the proof of major wartime atrocities committed by Japan.
They knew the proof was in the US, they now know why it landed there in the first place : the US purchased all data related to Japan's sick medical experiments on civilians of occupied countries. Actually, they bribed the perpetrators to get the exclusivity and even granted them immunity for this favor. This completed the scandalous Hiroshima-Nagasaki cleanup : you don't sue us for using weapons of mass destruction against your civilians, we don't sue you for committing atrocities on civilians from other countries. The 1951 San Francisco Treaty put an ultimate lid on this sick stew between one of History's most fascist regimes and the World's most cynical country.
Sixty years have passed and Japan is just realizing it may have to postpone its claim for a permanent seat at the UN council. Ten years from now, all witnesses and survivors to their atrocities will have vanished. Japan's radical old guard too, but they've made sure younger generations got overwhelmed by their forgetful propaganda and textbooks.
The US ? Don't worry about them : they know propaganda by heart. Hell : it didn't take them sixty years to have most people believe they defeated the Nazis singlehandedly (if it weren't for another master in propaganda - Vladimir Putin - who would remember the lighter side of Uncle Joe ?). And if you ask US citizens about the use of WMDs or torture against civilians, they point the finger to some far away Evil.

Red blogule to Prince Harry - When Harry met nazis

First time I saw the picture of Di's kid with that swastika armband I thought it was a fake (sweet Harry turning into "brown sugar" ?). About the same day Di Canio performed a "perfect" fascist salute to the Lazio fans. And then came Jean-Marie Le Pen's latest provocation. Already controversial public figures in unison. A pattern. Extremes on the rise across Europe and the World. Fundamentalist Christians and Muslims competing in a sick draft over Aceh's ruins. Wrong start for 2005. No wonder : last year ended with a wrong message from the US. Stephane MOT