Prisoner Of Wasilla - A short sighted Maverick

John McCain is a POW now. Prisoner Of Wasilla, he'll have to go all the way to November with the caricature of a Veep he picked in a last minute "hail Maria pass" (as Jonathan Atler splendidly put it).

Old Noah had to fill his Arch before the Gustav flood, but didn't have enough time to find a member of each species. With Sarah Palin, he filled a few checkboxes in one shot : Mac is targeting hardcore Hillarists ? Palin is a woman. Mac is turning 72 ? Palin is 44. Mac wants to rally ultraconservatives ? Palin is a mother of 5, against abortion rights, and a NRA activist. Mac wants to please Bush's fundamentalist base ? Palin prones the teaching of creationism / Intelligent Design at school.

Even better : as Mark Brown put it, "Palin gives them the reason (excuse?) they needed to vote for McCain, assuming they weren't already there. Now they won't be voting AGAINST the black man. They'll be voting FOR the woman." So the Palin quick fix is solving both the gender and race issues. Another way for McCain of evading the direct comparison with Obama.

Brilliant...

And pathetic.

This isn't a daring move but a purely defensive, tactical, and short sighted one. The kind of moves a cornered rookie chess player would try in an embarrassingly childish final display of bravado. John McCain has no long term vision whatsoever : he is simply everyday more desperate to please everybody, everyday more hollow and inconsistent.

Mac says he’s been keeping an eye on his Pal for years, but he actually met her 6 months ago, and called her only once about the job*. The "maverick" is gone, replaced by either a compulsive gambler, or someone who totally despises the Vice Presidency (after all, this very man already delivered a cristal clear definition for the job : "The vice president has two duties : one is to inquire daily as to the health of the president, and the other is to attend the funerals of Third World dictators").

What a contrast with the Obama - Biden ticket ! Barack chose Joe because he respected him for his judgement and his ability to challenge him a positive way for the good of the country, like a trustable and unbiased partner would do.

McCain-Palin ? They don’t respect each other. They don’t even know each other, never worked together. Can’t work together... unless, of course, John McCain decides to give up totally to his darker side, and accepts to lose the McCainistan war. I don't know whether he's lost his bearings, but I hope Independents won't lose theirs and follow such a dangerous path.

Let Obama take care of him in the Presidential debates.

Meanwhile, Hillary has unfinished job to do and I expect her to come out and expose Palin's imposture (she personifies what feminists abhorr : a former beauty queen**, a militant against abortion rights, a NRA activist willing to nuke Roe vs Wade). That would prove she really meant what the said the other night.

Before Hurricane Hillary touches down, the McCain-Palin duet intends to surf on Hurricane Gustav, the perfect Weapon of Mass Distraction : imagine them facing the elements in a spectacular New Orleans acceptance speech - what a dramatic, un-Conventional, un-big-stadium-extravaganza change ! The perfect PR op' at the best moment.

And far less risky than facing a mob of dubious and angry Reps.

* read "The story behind the Palin surprise" (Jonathan Martin on Politico 20080829)
** When you say "I think that’s a pretty, pretty event-filled and record-filled resume", are you talking about the Miss Wasilla 1984 line, John ? Do you really believe in this "agent of change" who doesn't understand evolution ?, this untested, small town celeb one heartbeat away of leading 300 million Americans ?

White blogule to the State of the Union speech - complete and uncut edition

Exclusive - a blogules scoop: Here is the original speech to be delivered by President George W. Bush today. The text may undergo some edition but the key issues shall remain valid.

Dear fellow Amerikans,

You didn't elect me on my 2000 program, where I presented myself as a "compassionate conservatist". I had to get my mandate through other channels.
You did elect me on my action during my first term, though, and on an openly radical and fundamentalist agenda.

The least one can say is I've been delivering the goods. You can count on me to go further in the same direction and with the same determination once my lifetime nomination is confirmed. I will durably lead Our Beautiful Country towards Freedom, Obscurantism and Absolutism.

I've been criticized for not nominating Billy Graham at the Supreme Court, but I simply had in mind a position more suited for his outstanding talent : from now on, Your Government will have a Chief Evangelist to whom will report, beyond the Supreme Court : the Department Of Justice, the Department of Homeland Security, and the Department Of Education. The Chief Evangelist will only report to God and the President and will always be nominated by the latter. He and his teams won't have to report to the Congress. On the contrary, the Chief Evangelist will nominate one third of all congressmen, selecting the most reliable candidates according to their knowledge of the scriptures and their devotion to the Intelligent Design.

Dear fellow Amerikans, despite being focused on the fight against Evil and Terror, Your Government keeps in mind other major challenges. Confronted to the rise of such countries as India or China, Our Wonderful Country can leverage on over 9 million square kilometers of land, but on a little bit less than 300 million people. We should be able to reach the density of - say - France, which would help us reach the one billion citizen mark.
Verily, verily, I say to you : Grow and Multiply ! Your Government will facilitate the building of new colonies across our most remote territories. We will for instance make sure every part of Alaska is not only suitable for well heated housing projects but also for tobacco or cotton fields. This dream can be fulfilled thanks to the immense reserves of this vast part of Our Glorious Nation.
We will also facilitate the circulation of all Amerikans between Alaska and the Mainland in spite of the wall we had to erect along the Canadian borders in order to stop their murderous terror attacts and their weaselish infiltrations of subversive ideologies.

I solemny remind the Canadian Government how seriously they should consider our ultimatum. Their pathetic gesticulations at what's left of the UN in Geneva won't help them escape their duties : we expect the full disclosure of their WMD programs and our british allies fully support this most vital request.
We will prevail : abandoned by the Commonwealth, the Canadian Government are in the last throes of their insurrection against their own people.

More than two centuries after its foundation, Our Lovely Country has never been so close to fulfil its dream of Freedom across the whole territory it was meant to liberate. We soon will be able to get rid of the absurd local administrations that paralyze our institutions. Inch'Allah, The United States of America shall become The United State of Amerika.

Long life to Liberty, long life to Freedom and God bless you all, Amen.

Red blogules to Walkers - oil for fool programs

George Walker B. asking US citizens to drive less in order to save gas* ? That Born Again Drunk Driver ? That very ruler of the Kingdom of SUV ? Next thing you know, Tom Waits will ask'em to quit smokin'... Amerika is running on empty, the budget trunk is empty, even the Pretzel Prez is empty. Coke wasn't strong enough for him : OD'ed on oil, then snorted pretzels and now gags on Greenhouse Gases. Yuck.

John B. Walker (head of the Independent Petroleum Association of America - or is it Petroleum Association Independant of America ? anyway, certainly not America Independant of Petroleum Association) seizes the opportunity and resumes lobbying : Alaska must save Amerika. Yuck.

America must save Alaska, but who will save America ? Joan Baez ? A new Kennedy ? Pat-Barack O'Bama ? Democrats ?
Nope : can't wait that long. Besides, the Reps must clean their own mess. They want to keep the power next year ? They'd better sideline the people who ruined their reputations. I expected this war of secession to start earlier but better late than sorry.


* "To Conserve Gas, President Calls for Less Driving" (NYT 20050927)