Still The Worst President Ever

Ten years ago, George W. Bush would launch the invasion of Iraq, his most successful decision as the Fundamentalist in Chief (see "Universal Declaration of Independence from Fundamentalism").

How is he doing nowadays? W. just visited Seoul for a couple of hours, the time to bring good luck to some important real estate project (and a nice check to his fat wallet). Exactly the kind of peacekeepers and bubblemakers the peninsula needs right now: following more Beijing-condoned sanctions from the UNSC, Pyongyang all but declared a nuclear war to the US.

But who knows, Bush The Second may be palling around with Kim The Third: his unofficial envoy* Dong Moon JOO attended KIM Jong-il's funerals. Note that "Douglas" JOO reunited with the Washington Times ahead of the trip, but never left the Unification Church, the cult founded by the late MOON Sun-myung, a very good friend of daddy George H. W. Bush.

Ever the masochist, I decided to check Dubya's official website, or rather that of the George W. Bush Presidential Center. It had been a long time since my last visit.

No mention of the lucrative trip, of course, but I found this gem on the homepage: Dubya riding a bike with friends (including a US flag bearer - you always need one of those when you climb high mountains), with this caption: "The Bush Center's Most Memorable Moments of 2012".

I couldn't resist and added a speech ballon: "Uh... say again: Lance said WHAT?"



blogules 2013
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* according to The Daily Beast ("The Bush Administration’s Secret Link to North Korea" - 20120207)

Delusion Points - an interview with George W. Bush

From blogule's Agence Fausse Presse, this exclusive interview of former President George Walker Bush covers the most controversial parts of his memoirs ("Derision Points" - 2010 Drown Publishers, 7 pages, $75.6):

Katrina, paint it black:

blogules: "You say Katrina represents an all-time low for you. Can it possibly be lower than your forged war, you near-death pretzel experience, or those shoes thrown at you during the last throes of your insurgency against US democracy ?"

GWB: "Some people said I was a racist and that's simply not true. A dangerous, hardcore, fundamentalist lunatic maybe, but a racist...? that's not fair. Even my dog Barney is black."

Chairman of the Waterboard:

blogules: "You write that allowing waterboarding was the right thing to do since your personal team of torture promoters considered it legal. Have you ever tried it ?"

Dubya: "Of course I did : when I was younger I tried almost everything, remember ? Actually, that's the way I managed to quit drinking. And that's the moment when I learned that Dick Cheney was a guy I could rely on."

blogules: "He waterboarded you himself ?"

W: "Dick loves board games."

DUI with Barbara:

blogules: "In your book, you mention a disturbing episode with your mother, when you drove her to the hospital after her miscarriage".

Georgie: "Oh, that...? That's how I recall it now but as you know, I was not always myself back then. Still now I've got flashes with different versions playing in my head. In one of them, Mom carries a pink baby elephant in a jar, and it looks and smells like gimchi. Maybe a gift from Reverend Moon, a friend of Dad's, who knows ?"

blogules: "But you said it was a trauma for you back then."

W: "Yep. I was quite disapointed by her. When she first mentioned a miscarriage, I understood she won a beauty pageant at the local GM dealership."

No WMD, no regrets:

blogules: "You dared say you were disapointed not to have found any Weapon of Mass Destruction in Iraq, but your invasion was the right decision anyway ?"

Fundamentalist in Chief: "The extreme right decision, to be more accurate. Come on... You're perfectly aware that our case for Iraq was completely forged, and our intel cooked to the bone. We invaded Iraq to give a boost to Muslim and Christian fundamentalism, and we succeeded beyond our wildest dreams."

blogules: "In a nut/bombshell: Mission accomplished ?"

Bush Jr: "Not yet: according to our plan, there must be a final war between Israel and Iran, then Jesus comes back, and ultimately the Texas Rangers win the World Series."

blogules: "I guess I can wait to read the next volume of your memoirs."


blogules 2010

Take me to the Moon, Daddy

George H. W. Bush will deliver a speech at the 25th anniversary party launched for The Washington Times by its owner, Reverend Sun Myung Moon.
The Washington Times is a lousy media losing a lot of money every year, but owning a newspaper in DC is more about influence than edition.
Herbie and Barbie already attended other anniversaries, of the birthday of the very sect leader, for instance. The thing is Moon is good at wedding people by batch, and 41 is good at faciliting meetings between bad and worse guys.
Moon Sun-myung for Senior and Billy Graham for Junior - the religion of money-making runs in the family blood.